new york is calling my name.

as i was writing that last post, i knew there were some big changes occurring in the near future. little did i know, it would be a move across the entire country. yep, there, i said it. i'm moving from california to new york! & really freakin excited about it. :) as of may of 2010 i have been pondering the thought of leaving los angeles (for whatever reason). i didn't know where i was going to go, or what i was going to do, or how i was even going to get there and when. but, i knew with the right timing, it would all unfold and happen just the way it should. it all does, right?? i tend to think it's a little/BIG man named God, that is on my team. no matter how much i question anything in my life, he intends for me to do that... he intends for me to struggle and wonder and seek because it will always teach me something. in this case, it was patience; to understand that no matter what the circumstance, i am not in control and i need to CHILL, and believe he will work it out. :) 

so, anyway i went to NY for fashion week. i had the most amazing experience both personally and professionally and would like to relive that trip over and over again. but instead, i'm moving there. my intentions are to continue doing what i do on the west coast, just transferring my life. literally. i have several pluses to this equation though...a. my best cali friend is coming with me, MEGGO! b. we will be living with my college roommate and dearest friend, AMANDA! i look forward to connecting 2 of my favorite people from 2 of the best times of my life. things are seeming to fall into place for the most part. which is why i know it's just right. i knew i could NEVER leave california without knowing it was right. i always said, i'll know when i'm supposed to go. and knowing that is the only thing that makes this move easy.                   

this experience and this beautiful place have been so good for me and my soul. i am thankful and blessed to say i did it and could never be more amazed at the opportunities i was presented. now...onto the next! ;) with great excitement!

xxL

zeee life i live

so, here we are. new background means new happenings. it's always nice to have a change... i enjoy it at least & speaking of change, i sense a lot of it happening for me in the near future. as i approach the end of August and my 24th birthday (on Tuesday) i am about to have the craziest month of my life. bday party, traveling, and moving into a new place...wherever that may be. but um, yeah, not only does a birthday celebration call for excitement but this year, it consists of a trip home!! to see my family. so, home to TN for a week. THEN, i'm OFF TO NEW YORK! i will say, the thought, the word, the abbreviation of NY makes me wanna screeeamm for joy. it's been 4 years since i lived there or visited! nuts. the best part of it all, i'm getting the opportunity to work fashion week for the second time in my life. only this time, as a hairstylist! i'm on the hair team for 2 shows which i am proud to say, is a dream job. most definitely. i am beyond thrilled and will be soaking up every single second of that experience. so then, i get back, work, work, work until the 20th and will be looking for a new residence in between something, somewhere in there. whew! not to mention, you should see this cluttered mess of a house that i am living in currently. SOMUCHWORKTODO. but, whatevs. that's life. right?

as for now, i'm going to rest my eyes. have a big morning interning at Mad Men, a photo shoot mid day AND, my bday dinner with friends at the beach! ahhhhh.....night!

xxL

long time no type.

^--^--^--me: ready to attack this blog land again.

apologies (to those who care). i have been such neglector of the blog world in the past 3 months. i went home for a month in may, i came back, had several visitors, spent my typical summer months basking in the goodness of what it is and honestly, just put this ole thing on the back burner. it's a bad thing to admit but, honesty is the best policy. right?

i have soooo much to catch up on and i will do so in the days to come. but, as for right now... i have had 3 glasses of wine and can hardly keep my eyes open. i'm exhausted, ready for        sleepytown, and an energized monday. we will talk soon. pinky promise.

doctor's note

How did it get so late so soon?

    It's night before it's afternoon.
      December is here before it's June.
    My goodness how the time has flewn.
          How did it get so late so soon?
                     ~Dr. Seuss

just a little blirb i found while searching for inspirational quotes in relevance to ''high school graduation.'' because well, even as hard as it is for me to believe, my 18 year old 'little brother' will be graduating in may, and leaving for college. currrazzzy. once again, time flies. it's a fact. not sure where it flies to or why it never repeats itself, but it definitely leaves a strong sense of mystery along the way. or is it satisfaction? maybe a bit of both. after all, i guess that is the very thing that makes life so grand. the unknowing trek that leads to hindsight which leads to understanding and wisdom, which is all discovered through.......time. 

LAST WEEK OF APRIL... enjoy! (i mean, reallllly? april is gone? what?) my point exactly.

xxL

countdown to hometown:

19 days!

sittin on dogs.

happy sunday peeps!

just sittin on little lucie bell today :). we're gonna go for a walk. but first, she wanted to pose for a quick snap shot. she says hi! gladly spending my day with her in the hood. gonna walk to the park! love to all.

xxL and L (lyd and lucie)

project saturday.

HOWDY DO!

i was lucky enough to have my saturday off today. :) no work...all play. it has been a beautiful sunny day and i didn't want it to go to waste. soooo, i decided to declare today, 'project saturday.' 

we have an area in downtown LA that is ohhh so nasty and ohhh so trashy, it's beautiful. it's known as the fashion district and everything is dirt cheap. which is the very reason i go there at least once a week. you would be amazed at the things you could find there. seriously, a store for every piece of a piece you could think of. it's really similar to china town in NY but, a little more raw. there are tons of factories and sweatshops near by and FIDM, the fashion school so, it is quite convenient to have in the area. you name it, cheap fabric stores, bead stores, button stores, shoe stores, sunglass stores, luggage stores, blah blah blah, the list goes on. anywayzzz... i have been meaning to make a special earring for me and my roomie for quite sometime, and just haven't gotten around to doing so. well, today was the day. i went to the feather store (yes, i said it), there is a store devoted solely to feathers called Mother Pluckers, followed by the beads and trimming shop, got my goods, came home and got to work! in about 20 minutes i came up with my new original BIG ORANGE feather earring. :) a little premature for football season, but enough to get me excited for gamedays this fall! go me. go vols.

VOILA! it's quite a joy. take a gander! 

xxL

COUNTDOWN TO HOMETOWN:

20 DAYS!

party shirt :)

first of all, let's just point out that it's friday night & yeahhh....i'm just abloggin'. :) nope, not out on the town. just abloggin'. hence the reasoning behind the PARTY SHIRT? yeppers! you see, i don't need to actually partake in the party, as long as i am wearing the ''official party shirt'', it's just the same. well, minus those loud obnoxious people around me making a huge scene and forcing me to adapt to their inhumane ways. mmhmm, all i need is the party shirt. 

sooo...it's friday, going on saturday and i'm doin guuud. being a homebody and loving it. just partyin' in my party shirt. :)

xxL 

COUNTDOWN TO TENNESSEE CALENDAR:

3 WEEKS! aka 21 DAYS! wooohooo

abscessed.

no. i didn't say, obsessed. i said, abscessed. and by that i mean, yes, my tooth. can you say TERRIBLE, MISERABLE pain?? cuz that's what i am SCREAMINg. i have been battling this little/kinda big problem for over 2 years now but didn't realize what the severity of it actually was. about a week ago, i started having severe pain on one of my back teef. (#14 to be exact). sooo i, of course, sulked in my misery and pain and expected it to just go away on its own. well, unfortunately, that didn't happen. i started running a fever of 102 for 2 days and was in the bed crying like an infant. so, with that said, i finally realized something needed to be done. problem is, a. i have no dental insurance. and b. i have no california dentist. sad life huh... long story made short, my dentist from home calls me in some meds to tame the infection that was obviously affecting my blood stream and commands me to be seen to establish the urgency of this handicapped tooth. so today was the day. after 2 weeks of being on antibiotics and thankfully experiencing less pain, i went to see the dentist! which, mind you, was the SWEETEST lady i have ever met in my life. i wanted to go home with her. but, that's beside the point. she had me x-rayed and walked me through the informative process of how a tooth becomes abscessed. sure enough, my little #14 will most definitely require a root canal. it's probably gonna hurt like hell but, i think it deserves a new life. it's all about second chances people.

so, this thursday seems like a bore fest?? noooooo. i walked away with a new toothbrush and toothpaste! 

p.s. dear JOSIE, this seems most appropriate for you. it's a dedication to you...consider it a welcome hug to my blog. :) 

xxL

topic of discussion:

yeahhh...

i know i talk about it a lot. but, it's important to me. 

get it? love.

xxL

easter love.

little bunny foo foo hoppin through the forest, scoopin up the field mice and boppin em on the head. :)

happy easter to allllllllllllll you precious, dear peeps. i am looking forward to a beautiful sunday with church, my best friends, proceeded with brunch in Laguna Beach. yeah... that sounds about as close to perfect that easter sunday can be. it would be 100% perfect with my family and 1175 mountain road but, i'll get by with the love we share through the phone lines. 

easter love.

xxL

bunny tales.

of course, i alwayyyys get excited when i have mail!... like physical, envelope in hand sealed, signed, and addressed kind of mail. one reason being, these days, it seems so obsolete! everyone is always emailing or messaging online or texting or whatever. i like to call that the fast and lazy way out. :) no but really...i love to get something with my name on it in the mailbox. especially from my momma and even more especially for the holidays! so today, i received a little white envelope with my name on it, from marthy, & with a smile on my face, i open my sweet easter card that reads,

"The moment was bittersweet when the bunny realized Easter was not about him... (inside) It's all about Jesus!" 

:) gots ta love that. as the easter bunny sits in church with his little green basket of eggs and cute little red suspenders he discovers that... he is no longer the reason for the season. hehe it puts things in a humorous perspective but in all reality, it is HIM, being JESUS, that we celebrate this weekend. i will say i am sooo thankful for his painful sacrifices. it is unimaginable to think of the love he had for each of us, even before we were here, and for that i am blessed. happy easter my friends! 

"It is true! The Lord has risen." Luke 24:34

xxL 

bunnies and tutu's.

HAPPPPPPPPPPPY 1st day of April! i'm diggin this photo. & i am officially considering it my inspiration for spring. :) i feel it. although, we don't really have a spring in cali, i KNOW it's happening. it's in my bonnnnnes. not to mention, my mom and sis give me an update on how BEAUTIful the weather is in Tennessee literally, every hour. i kinda miss the excitement of a new fresh start. unlike here where it goes from cold and rainy to hot and sunny like lickety split! spring time is always my favorite time. like, starting new...a cleansing and riddance of cold and bitter to a welcoming of fresh, cheerful, sunny days. i look forward to this month and will hold on to it tight like a teddy. 

1st words that come to mind on this 1st day of April:::

pink.flower. floral. tutu. lace. spiders. freckles. grassy. curly. cartwheels. chirpy. birdy. blooms. 

bye.

xxL

march man.

this guy sums up my month of march. it's been kinda BIG, and GRAND, and little FUZZY, seeing as how, it went by so quickly i hardly remember what happened. i'm gonna go out on a limb and say the ''march madness'' theme goes hand in hand too. either way, it's been a good month. love this transition month from winter to spring. ready ready ready for april! 

here's to you mr. big-haired, cotton ball-headed, march madness man!

xxL

flags flags flags flags flags flags...6 flags

although, technically, it isn't morning here. well, technically, it is (12:43). but, let's not get too technical. i just found this peanuts clip and it made me smiley. not sure but, maybe thinking it reminded me of the fact that in the morning, I AM GOING TO SIX FLAGS! and perhaps that reminded me that, i will be quite cheerful... as a matter of fact, already am. mid week fun with some friendsies. yesssssoo yesso.

xxL

bruised bananas

ummm....nom nom nom. 

not feeling very inspired by anything in particular tonight. kind of heavy headed. meaning, got a lot on my mind and very un-eager to share via blog post for the whole entire world to see. although, i know deep down the whole entire world doesn't read my blog, it's scary to think of the possibilities. i'm like stuck in this, need a break from los angeles phase again. it happens quite often actually. it's such a thriving city. OBVIOUSLY, there is so much to do, beautiful weather, so much excitement all the time, but like the song says, ''....looking for a thrill, but, you've done it all.'' not to sound like negative nancy, but i'm kind of really ready to put my blue jeans back on. ;) (not that i really ever took them off). just thinking that, tennessee...and the lake...and a sundress with my cowboy boots, a beer, and the grassy front yard is starting to sound verrrry good to me. more often that usual. there again, i must remind myself, i change my mind like i change my undies but, a move might seriously be in the cards for the future. now, all of this is ''off the record.'' because, WHO KNOWS what life could offer in the next few months. but, either way, it makes me excited to think of those options. gots to factor in career opportunities somehow someway but realllllly, i know anything is possible.

ok, so.... that was totally oxymoronic of me to say, ''ohhhh i have so much on my mind but i don't want to spill via blog'' [but, i guess i will anyway]. dummy. let's be honest, life can't be strawberries and cool whip every single day. there will be bruised nanners in the mix. afterall, that leads to banana bread... right? (yummm)

love to all & goodnight.

xxL

lookie there, a totally uninspired me makes a quick turnaround to finding deep, analytical meaning in.... fruit. odd.

thankin' and smilin'

just thankin of old frannds. :) and smilin of old days.... 

i was talking with a guy friend of mine yesterday that i (kind of) grew up with, about life... by the way, i consider anything from middle school on, growing up. because, let's admit, we do A LOT of wild, crazy 'growing up' at that age. well, anyway, he was asking me about all of our fabulous hometown friends and how they were all doing, where their lives had taken them, what kinds of cool exciting jobs they had gotten themselves into, etc... and well, it got me to thinking about just howwww time flies so quickly. i've known this and i often when i think about it's seriousness, say to myself, wowww. a month no longer seems like a month. it seems like 4 weeks that really breaks down into one week at a time that breaks down into 7 days and then, every single day is like a blink.... and it's gone. like whoooooosh. weird. that was kind of very confusing. a description that seems somewhat scattered, kind of like my brain. but, anywayzzz... it made me kind of reflect on where i am now, compared to where i was like 5 years ago. & compared to where i thought i would be 5 years from that point, i feel like i am doing pretty well. :) i'm satisfied. that's important i guess. growing up is bittersweet. i miss my old lifetime friends. i want to see them everyday and hug on em' and love on em.' that would be in a dream world. but, regardless, old friends...... you are in my heart and on my mind. ALWAYS. 

Happy Humpday! and yayyy! I bought a lonnnnng time wished for, mint green beach cruiser today! HIPHIP!

xxL

with lots of heart.

each day, as i leave my room, i admire my little personalized, framed artwork. a simple reminder to carry on throughout my day as if all i have to give is.... love. one is only capable of exuding and sharing happiness through a sincere loving heart, lots and lots of heart. so, there ya have it, a simplified journey through everyday life.

p.s. the medium used for this fancy shmancy artwork is.... cheap bright red lipstick. :)

xxL

birth of momma marthy

good, great, grand weekend. lots of hard work, topped off with a day at the antique flea market. :) 

my jobs have been pretty exciting the past couple of days. friday was a day spent with erin andrews (espn girl) and evan lysacek (olympic gold metalist) for a media tour promoting dancing with the stars. it was a lot of fun but pretty SUCKY that my call time was, yes...4 am. i was literally putting my shoes on to walk out the door as my roomies were coming in from a night out. fun... not.  i felt like i was a moonlighter working the night shift. anyway, that was an eventful morning. the positive there was that i was finished working by 10 am! full day ahead folkssss. yesterday, my saturday, was packed. started in the morning with a photo shoot with the cast of GLEE for Emmy magazine and stayed there for about 5 hours before i headed to a celebrity benefit/gala. it was a fundraiser for an elementary school in north hollywood. get this.... huge event, over 750 people/parents invited, put together and produced by one of the producers of ''Friends''- Marta Kauffmann, and involving Steve & Nancy Carell, Jason Alexander (Seinfeld), Breckin Meyer (Road Trip), Eric McCormack (Will&Grace), Kathy Najimy (Hocus Pocus), etc... so, naturally, they hired a team of hairstylists and makeup artists??....ONLY IN LA. the whole time i was trying my hardest to imagine such a huge event happening in honor of my elementary school in clinton, tn.... it was nearly impossible to think up. i mean, i guess i can sort of, vaguely remember similar experiences in the cafeteria with, from what i recall, chilli suppers and drawings for free mcdonalds and pizza hut coupons. yeah, not so much parallel to the 'GALA'... anyway, very neat. got to meet lotttts of interesting (some unpleasant) people that just reconfirmed that, we are all just normal people. regardless of our 'status' or lack thereof. 

may i add.... i purchased (and had to go to great lengths to achieve bc of ATM issues) the most amazzzzing handmade, 3D embroidered portrait today at the swap meet. i'm serious when i say, AMAZING. that's probably an understatement. to forever have reference to my gypsy inspired life, i will hang this on my wall, wherever i reside, forever and evaaaaa. picture to come.....

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY SWEET MOMMA TODAY! 

xxL

love and miss.

just my p's..... i miss them IMMENSELY.

xxL

Jesus and Hollywood.

how could i forget to mention!..... basically, i am directly behind these disney lovin peeps during this paparazzi photo sesh. just walkin into church (20 minutes late) mindin my own. kinda strange and disturbing that the photogs even lurk around church but, i guess that is what you get when you mix Jesus and Hollywood....a day in the life. yep yep yep.

p.s. i have mixed feelings about not being in this picture. part of me is like, whewww thank you G. and the other part of me is like....awwww MAN! 

xxL

hello from slackerville.

wellllll...i would like to think i had been doing a very good job at keeping my blog life up to sparkly condition but once again, like most all routine in my life, i have fallen into the slacker category...with all the other losers. but, HERE i am! again! just a tonnn going on in the past two weeks actually. a lot that makes me proud and a lot that made me happy!

the first week of march, i had an on location project/job in a charming little town called

Cambria, California. it is about 5 hours north of LA and literally in the middle of no where, which i reallllly loved. i got to get away! it felt like i was on vacation but, got paid! nice little combo action. so basically, we had no cell phone service, no internet, no genuine connection with the world itself. (ok, that's a little exaggerated but, it was pretty restricting). honestly though, i didn't mind it. i would have loooved to blog daily just for reference because it was such an awesome experience but, oh wells. we're getting a post experience blog update. hehe back to intro: small (tiny) rural farm town with lottts and lots of green grass and hills and trees and wine vineyards and horses and cows and what else?... the OCEAN. in my mind, totally contrasting and contradicting but, only because i had never witnessed all of those goodies together, in the same basket. :) and, i had never actually thought about the fact that they would be sooo beautiful together. it was very refreshing to well, first and foremost, get out of LA for a few days and then to actually feel a little sense of home with all the greenery and fresh air and open land and...nice, genuine people. yeahhh, 100% real quality people. both, on the crew i worked and within the town. everyone was so warm and welcoming. it was simple, and that's something most everyone in this city forget is most rewarding. the job itself was kind of outlandish, surreal, aka...nuts! we were basically shooting an informative video for this billion-are man and his sweet sweet wife. it was a week, on an 80 acre ranch, included with a SMALL (massive) what they refered to as a 'castle' that took 12 years to build, a few CHEAP (worth more than my life) cars, a personal helicopter with helipad in the back yard (don't you have one of those?), a private jet, & the most exciting part of it all, my first (and probably my last) ride in a rolls royce.  it was a truly unforgettable experience that makes me realize that i am indeed doing exactly what i should be doing with my life at this point! confirmed. 

this past week, my cousin ella marie came to town with 2 friends from UT on their first spring break as 'college babes' (DUN DUN DUN). sooo....me, being the hostess and resident

of the fabulous city, wanted to show them a goooood, well-rounded trip to Los Angeles. in the course of a week we, went to jimmy kimmel and saw the old, crummy, annoying bachelor jason mesnick and his new wife molly, attended an oscar party that my neighbor had, complete with a red carpet and all, went horseback riding in the hollywood hills, and almost died mind you while my 'wild mustang' pretty much attempted to dump me off the edge of the canyon, went to a jay leno taping, watched the sunset on the beach in santa monica, drank wine on the beach in malibu topped off with margarita's in venice and to end the fabulous trip with a bang, graced the tattoo/piercing parlor on melrose with our presence...yeppers, all in the same night. :) ella got her nose pierced while her friends got their navels. and, yes, my whole family is out to get me but, chances are, they'll never find me. hehe needless to say, it has been a VERY eventful past two weeks and I AM FULFILLED. 

jumpingforjoy...again.

xxL

new friends.

                   ERIN- KRISTEN- ME- BLAIR

i'm not going to lie. i just had a greattttt night last night with some great friends. one of which is a new friend but i would venture to say a best friend. i tell no lies.....she and i are identical souls. it's fun to meet new people out here. always  a new adventure. blair is a friend of magan, a best friend of mine from college, that has moved out here to be a makeup artist as well. from georgia, went to auburn, another little southerner following her heart. :) pretty much meant to be. fun fun fun stuff. HERE'S to new friends!

going to chick-fil-a today!! this is big because....well....the nearest chick-fil-a is about 45 minutes away. i would say it's definitely worth it. yeahhhhh. happy friday to all you peeps! weekend, i love you.

xxL

oh jane.

i don't really know much of anything at all about this picture. other than, he looks scared to death but, content, comfortable, and confident that he made the right choice. (or maybe he's pissed, i can't really tell). and she looks as if there is nothing else in the world that could phase her at that very moment. she has just made the best decision of her life. 

so, i was googling a girl from a tv show named ''jane'' which just so happens to also be my sweet grandmother's name... this was the first image that came up. :) i kind of love it. there is something so innocent about marriage. it's something two people experience based solely upon a positive emotion. it's simply about being young and happy and in love and knowing no other response nor wanting to know any other response to that feeling. it's a leap of faith as two. kind of sweet...kind of foreign (to me). but in the end, yes, love and marriage is a terrifying yet somehow wonderful thing.  

xxL

lively exhaustion.

well....today equals tired. long day but good day. i worked, and that always means good things. i started work at Rosie Jane this morning where, we had some exciting news! we had some major press come out this week in People Magazine for Leila Lou as Jennifer Aniston's favorite perfume! pretty much exciting. so, we had a ton of press kits we had to put together for all of our clients/boutiques who carry the fragrance along with a LOAD of new orders because of the popularity and celebrity association. it's a really cool learning experience. Rosie (the creator/owner of the company) is Jennifer Aniston's personal makeup artist so, that is the connection. :) J. Aniston gave her a big shoutout! foooo shizz. we have some more press coming out next week in USweekly and one more magazine, not sure what yet. but, it's all very exciting to be a part of. Rosie initially brought me on as an assistant/sales rep. because of the the launch of the new fragrance. now that it is really taking off, i feel fortunate to have gotten on at an early stage so i am able to watch and learn from the growing process.  

i ended my day with some formal Bobbi Brown training...the first official day. it was kind of brain fill overload. i'm afraid a lot of what i learned went in one ear and out the other. eeeek. guess that means more reading for this gal. regardless, i am soooo thrilled to be joining this company as well. lots of opportunities and ways for advancement. even if it is years down the line...gotta start somewhere!

i am thankful for my life every single day. at times, when i forget about how free spirited and emotion-driven i am, i worry about security and stability and finances, etc...i mean, that's the point i am in my life, more serious responsibilities. but, those are the times that i lose sight of the most important things... happiness and the joy of doing what i TRULY love. being brave enough to put all fear aside and say to myself, that's what i want??...well, why CAN'T i?? i'm doing it. i don't wanna take it for granted. it's the balance between real life and dream land that i have to conquer. there is a way! i know it.

leaving you with a little something i wrote down while i was home. i found my senior yearbook (that had been lost for 6 years) and read what my mom and dad had written to me as a 'senior farewell' note. it kind of gave me chills. this is why they are my favorite people... :) p.s. my favorite parts are in ALL CAPS. 

''as you leave home remember...through the days and years of your life, you do not go unnoticed. you leave an impression along the way. DO NOT BE AFRAID OF CHANGE, BE AFRAID OF NOT CHANGING. DO NOT MEASURE GROWTH BY TIME BUT RATHER BY EXPERIENCE and do not measure your success by another's. BE TRUE TO YOURSELF lydia and seek God's will for your own. you may not think you have made much of a difference in this world, but you have in ours! we love you and are so proud of you.''  

xxL

to do list.

sunday at the beach.

 

sundays always come with a pleasant anticipation... generally, it means, ''sunday funday!'' a cliche description but, you get the idea. ;) today, with it being sunday, me, meggo (the roomie), and her friend Brad who is visiting from NY decided, it was a day for the beach! of course... why not? it was beautiful, in the 70's, a little breezy, a little sunny. the only solution was the beach. it's always a good freeing feeling to get away from the city/hood (where i reside) and blend in with the beach bums. we went to my favorite, manhattan beach. which also happens to be the first place i stayed and ever visited when i came to california 2 years ago. so, i hold a dear place in my heart for sweet 

manhattan. so, needless to say, it's been a great weekend! i spent yesterday with the out of towner Brad and had my first ever LA subway/metro experience. i felt like new yorker again. :) rode to china town, loved on some chinese new year celebrations and some cheap (very nasty) chinese food. gagggg me but oh well. i love my weekend time. it's been a good one.

xx, lyd

old school is oh so cool.

so, i went home last week. it was relaxing, duh. it was full of love, duh. it was fun filled, duh. but, it was really reflectful (even though that isn't a word). i had a little fun on a cold, snowy valentine's day and went through some old pictures that were delightfully precious. they are now hanging on my 'inspiration board' beside my desk and i get to smile at them everyday. they make me want to scream and shout for joy. 

now..............................................andthen.
the moms...being sweet and innocent-like. horseback.
the first car. :) pretty envious.
the first days together. and, i REALLY am obsessed with these two people.

refreshed.

i've been in my room a lot today... it's been nice. partly because i have a huge suitcase in my floor staring at me, waiting to be unpacked, and i've had every intention of doing so at some point (hasn't happened). and partly because, well, i like it. being by myself is fun. it kind of actually teaches me a lot... therapeutic... makes me think. today, while getting some quality lydia time, i thought about:

• the amount of LOOOVE i have for california.
  
• how, after spending a relaxing week at home with my family and friends, especially my sweet and encouraging mom and dad, i want to create some way of carrying each person i love around in my pocket throughout my day to day activities. then, i would be perfectly content. need nothing more. you think it's possible?
  
• how, the previous thought is exactly what makes some aspects of life so bittersweet... after all, aren't they the ones who mold you into what you become so you are able to spread your wings? then, do things on your own? why can't they reap the benefits of your successes and your amazing life experiences? they are my best friends and sometimes, separation anxiety sucks.
• while this ''self-employment thing'' is rewarding and motivating and full of passion chasing goodness, i would rather not have to think about the taxes that come along with it at this time of year. blahhh. 
• how, the new picture additions of my vintage mom and dad and the (totally 90's) sisterly bonding time with meredith posted beside the more recent photo of us at her wedding are so fitting for my inspiration board.
• how, really...in all honesty...i have too many clothes. 
• how, the smell of my vanilla candle could sing to me everyday and be the single contribution to my overall happiness. :)
• how, my weekend ahead might be filled with a trip to the beach. 
• my new fresh smelling, clean sheets will be the best thing that happened to me when i crawl in bed tonight. i'm excited.

needless to say, my brain has been racing. alllll day. filled with good thoughts of course.

xx

feeling.refreshed.

we are okay.

currently...listening to a put you in a good mood song by joshua radin, "we are okay." so true. we are okay, we are alright. proving to be especially true tonight. after a long productive day of working and running around los angeles like a wild banchey with errands and such...i am finally looking forward to the end of tomorrow, february 9th. when, at last, i will be sitting in my little foster family living room wrapped up in a big gigantic sweater, enjoying the cold weather and warmth of my mom and diddy. i assume i won't be enjoying the exhaustion from traveling all day buttttt, i guess i'll take one for the team. 

more exciting happenings:

..got a new crackberry today(!)

..got another fabulous job freelancing for bobbi brown(!)

..get to look forward to the possibility of my sweet cuz ella marie coming to visit in march(!)

..got the pleasure of naming kendall's baby goldfish: ARLINGTON(!)

..GOTLOTSTOBETHANKFULFOR.

xx

dear john.

dear john. 

you are gorgeous, hot, steamy, sexy, spicy, smooth, delicious. ohhh yea... the movie was BOMB. unfortunately, on the way to the movie while running across the street, in the pouring rain, my crackberry fell out of my pocket and landed in front of a mack truck. under the front left tire to be exact. as i went back to get it, the navigation ball (essential to the phone's operations), was missing. i thought to myself....a. i could go back and miserably stand in the middle of the street to look for it and risk getting hit by a mack truck. or b. pick the phone up, and consider it a loss. obviously, i chose the latter but, i am still trying to figure out what to do about the text messages i can't send or receive. bummersss.